Day 29

We were lucky here in London yesterday as we had a small preview of what summer has in store. The temperature was amazing, so I spent good part of my afternoon on our local swimming pool. It was pretty busy and the braver amongst us enjoyed water and swimming, I however stuck to the edge of the pool and sunbathing trying to top up my UK winter depleted vitamin D reserves. I went to the 7pm class with one of my favourite teachers, after whose class I always feel worked out to the maximum, and last night was no different. While some of them occasionally swing the studio door open for a couple of seconds to let a bit of air in and help students through the more challenging postures, this is not his ethos. No doors opened, not even for a nanosecond last night and it was hot! hot! hot! Overall a good class, my legs are stiff this morning and ache from all the stretching at the back. These past 29 days have flown by. Ok, admittedly there were days where I thought this will never end and 9 months of pregnancy comparably seemed to have passed a lot quicker, but these were only moments. Relativity of time, eh? 

Finally, I can't round up my blog tomorrow without saying a couple of things about the one and only - Ustrasana or Camel posture - the deepest backward bend of the bikram series. This has always been one of the most revealing, surprising and more than anything else - emotional postures for me. Very often I get strange pulsating waves all over the front of my abdomen and on some occasions a strange swelling feeling in my throat, similar to the the one you get when holding back floods of tears. I never quite know how I'll feel after I come out of it, sometimes I want to sob and cry, sometimes laugh and sometimes I am awash with waves of calmness. Something happens every time, without warning so I'm always cautious when this one approaches. Quite a number of people told me they feel super nauseous while attempting to hang in there and I remember this being the case with me a couple of year ago too but this has now gone. Powerful stuff. The following are some benefits of Camel: 

- stimulates the nervous system

- compresses the spine and relieves back problems

- flushes blood through kidneys and improves the elimination of toxins

- opens shoulders, rib cage, creates space for lungs and digestive system

- strengthens back and shoulder muscles

- improves flexibility of neck and spine

- extends throat, thyroid gland and parathyroid glands

- slims abdomen and waistline

Now about those emotional outbursts, and promise my practice is not an exception, they happen to most of people especially in the beginning. I am no expert, as a matter of fact I know very little about chakras and all that stuff but here is what they say:

Known as a “heart opening” yoga pose, Ustrasana stimulates and balances both the fourth and fifth chakras located at the heart and throat centers, respectively. In many practitioners, the heart and throat centers are often closed off and protected, as evidenced by slouching, lowered chins, and poor posture. For this reason, practicing Ustrasana can sometimes stir up emotions in the practitioner more than other poses. It is important to keep a calm awareness of your feelings when practicing this pose; fear of your emotions can create stiffness in the body and may lead to injury....Ustrasana can be an emotionally moving and energizing yoga posture. It is vital to listen to your body throughout the pose. If your breath becomes short and strained, ease up a bit. Keep your thoughts calm and steady by returning your awareness to your breath and the present moment. Like a camel, Ustrasana can take you on a journey to new and foreign parts of yourself. Take the path slowly, stay in the moment, and allow these new parts of yourself to open wide.

(www.yogaoutlet.com)

Therefore, if you would like to 'Let it go' just bend back and open up your heart! Namaste!


BALKAN FLOOD RELIEF - just in case you missed yesterday's post
http://novakdjokovicfoundation.org/news/news/2014.734.html

Day 28

Very short post today, well more of an appeal really. I can't help but feel terribly saddened and upset by the news coming from Balkans over the last couple of days and my thoughts are with people there. A large area has been struck by the worst floods for decades after three months' worth of rain fell on the region in just a few days causing rivers to burst their banks. In Bosnia, landslides have buried houses and disturbed land mines that remained after the war in 1990s. Thousands of adults and children have had to flee their homes and more than 35 people have died but the numbers continue to rise. One ray of sunlight in all of this comes from witnessing the solidarity of people in action, both from media reports and seeing a huge number of people in my personal social networks who are offering help, making donations or volunteering on the ground. So, if you are in a position to do something perhaps you can start here. Here is a link to 'Novak Djokovic Foundation' blog listing how one can help. Thank you!

http://novakdjokovicfoundation.org/news/news/2014.734.html

Day 27

Wonderful weather here in London this weekend. Day 27 was the perfect sort of day to make the most of our local Arts Festival. A couple of weeks ago I picked up this booklet from a local store listing addresses of an incredible number of artists opening their homes for public and displaying their works. (big thanks to my friend J for the heads-up!) So, on Saturday the four of us set off to explore the art in our neighbourhood. We walked for four hours, visited a good number of open houses and studios. Girls' stamina was impressive, an odd biscuit or treat here and there offered by generous hosts kept them going for hours. In the end we came home in very late in the afternoon, having bagged a painting along the way, just in time for me to make it to a late evening class. 

In terms of practice, I have noticed an incredible increase in my core strength. Nowhere is this more visible than in the tricky Trikanasana or the Triangle pose. This challenging master posture used to be my pet hate, but increasingly I begin the standing series longing to get into the Triangle.  Bikram C. says that when you improve your triangle, you improve your life 360 degrees: sexually, mentally, physically, financially, emotionally. Woohooo! I won't question this a lot, whatever the benefits all I know that at the moment it's just so much fun doing it!
The other posture where my core strength comes to the forefront is the Half Tortoise - I go down with control, and easily touch my forehead to the floor before my hands reach the ground. This was pretty much impossible to achieve at the beginning of this year and after two pregnancies so close to each other. But, I'm there now!

Finally, the last thing I've been meaning to mention here for some time now is how the incredible it is to check the Google Stats for this page every now end then. Sometimes it is slightly overwhelming to see how many of you guys are there and how truly global the audience is - loads of you guys in US, all across Europe - UK, Spain, Belgium, Finland to name just a few; Russia, China, Australia... I could go on and on. So if you are reading this, thank you for your time and please do get in touch either here or via e-mail. I'd love to hear your thoughts and comments, especially if you are practicing bikram or doing/planning to do a challenge some time in the future or thinking about going to your first ever class. Namaste!

Day 26

In the studio where I practice the last evening class on Friday's is usually a candle lit class. Up until now I have instinctively avoided these, but last week due to a number of engagements I had on during the day, had no choice but give it a go. This is meant to be a good way of unwinding at the end of a busy week. I however, did not find it relaxing. It was hard work, the room was very hot and unusually humid, more than on your average bikram day. This meant that even before the class begun, while waiting on the mat, I noticed small drops of sweat rolling down my back. The fact that you can't see yourself in the mirrors also means that you need to really go back to your body and concentrate super hard on every little inch of it to find all those little adjustments that one needs to make in different postures. I don't think the candle lit class will be on my regular schedule in future, as it kind of goes against of things that I embrace in bikram - one of which is the open eye meditation in bright light environment. Looking at your very scarcely dressed reflection in the brightest of lights for 90 minutes some may call brutal, I on the other hand find liberating. You learn to appreciate your body and what it can do. Love and cherish any imperfections no matter how big or small because they are there for a reason and make you who you are. Namaste!

Day 22-25

Been pretty busy over the past week but still managed to squeeze in daily 3 hours for my practice, sadly not enough time to write here so decided to bundle up day 22, 23, 24 and 25 posts together into a brief oveview. Here are some things I learned...

...about People
- sometimes yoga studio is like a small reflection of the world outside. When you go a lot you tend to bump into people that spend a lot of time there themselves. Sometimes you acknowledge each other by a quick smile, nod or hello, sometimes you make friends. I noticed that during the practice I like to practice close to some people - you just share the similar focus, they move at the similar pace to you, and if they fall out of the standing bow they go right back into it - these are the people that help you keep in balance, just like friends out of studio. Then there is nervous kind of practitioner, and there are many others - competitive guys, shufflers, etc. - I've started avoiding having my mat to close to them...

...about Postures
- "The posture begins when you want to come out of it'. True. When at most uncomfortable, with perseverance ultimately you will make that little bit of a progress - kick up higher, balance better, touch the forehead to the knee etc. that will keep you coming back for more the next day, and the day after that and after. I often get asked how come I don't get bored doing the same 26 poses every day and that is why. Every day is different and every day your body allows you to do different stuff, some days more of one thing some day more of some other. Speaking of which, on Tuesday I finally just managed to touch my head on the floor between my feet in Standing Separate Leg Stretching. My husband can vouch for that, as he went to the practice with me and saw it happening while standing in front of me and hanging upside down trying to sort out his own Standing Separate Leg...
I also began viewing the whole practice as a single thing instead of the series of 2 breathing exercises and 26 postures. In practice this means that I treat coming out of the postures with the same care I treat my postures, coming out slowly and with control, linking one posture to the next.
Can't log off without saying how much the opening sentence here applies the the final Savasana. Usually my first instinct when I get into it and hear the final 'Namaste' is to run out of the room and find some cold air, but I'm finding the longer I make myself lie there the better, calmer and more energised I feel once away from the studio

...Random
- yoga with Korean food induced upset tummy combined with pms cramping not fun (for ladies out there - heat does help). Do not try this at home.
- Jackie Brown is still Q.Tarantino's best film...

Day 21

Easy afternoon, 5pm, class today with one of my favourite teachers. Seems like I've bounced back from the Friday morning low point and I am really pushing myself hard again. 90 minutes just flew by today and I wasn't even hot. My body has pretty much totally adjusted to 40 degrees C temperature by now. Dreading going to a future beach holiday anywhere with temperatures below 30 degrees as I might find it a bit chilly... 
Once out of the studio I floated back home and upon arrival realised that I'm NOT hungry. Hmmm? This has been happening over the last couple of days - I get home and feel like I do not want a big dinner. It's strange, because during the first two weeks of the challenge I have literally been demolishing the content of our fridge. Now, this has just stopped. The insatiable hunger has mysteriously disappeared. Instead, the mysterious cravings have appeared. So far, I have eaten an incredible amount of fresh radish, artichokes, coconut chunks, nuts and dried cherries. None of which featured much in my previous diet. Radish is by now a clear obsession. Having googled it today to check out its nutritional values, I was surprised to find out that it is full of potassium. Is this my body being really really clever and asking for what it needs as opposed to what looks good? Perplexed. 

In addition to what's already mentioned above, I'm off meat - red especially; totally off. This doesn't puzzle me so much as it happened before when I practiced 3 or 4 times a week. The final major change in my relationship to food is that I now prefer it raw-ish. Less processed - the better. So, during my today's google quest to try and find out what's happening to me I stumbled upon a concept of 'clean eating'. This in a nutshell is a lifestyle approach to food, basically striving to eat unprocessed stuff and consume food in its most natural state possible. Definitely something I can relate to right now. Anyhow I'd say that on the good days my family's diet is pretty clean already, but made a promise to myself to make it even cleaner and leaner. It helps that we have a great farmer's market on our doorstep every weekend and can load up with fresh, organic produce on a regular basis. If you are interested in clean eating have a look at these rules - '10 Rules of Clean Eating'. Thanks to the rule 3 below, I'll never view the supermarkets in the same way again...

3 / Shop The Perimeter Of The Grocery Store

Every store is different, but as a general rule, the periphery is the natural habitat of the fresh vegetable, meat market, whole-grain baked goods, and the nuts and dried fruits in the bulk bin. Get comfortable here; it is now your territory.

You'll probably have to venture into the interior for some staples like olive oil, but keep your blinders on. You're entering a museum of extravagant packaging and manipulative slogans. Few of the items you see in the store's interior promote good health; it's a stretch to call most of it "food."

The perimeter is also usually the home of the dairy case and the beer and wine display, so stay strong. Of course, if these are your biggest offenses, you could do a lot worse.

(source: www.bodybuilding.com)

Day 20

20!!!! Woooohooo! 2/3 done! I was a little bit worried about getting into the studio today after yesterday's 6am fiasco. I plucked up my courage but as I walked into the hot room, put the towel on my mat and slowly sat down another thought came to my mind - 2 glasses of champagne, dear God help me! - do we have another storm approaching? Turns out, not! A good class, sailed through postures, maybe drank slightly more water that I'd normally do. I've been trying to wean myself off, so lately been consuming very little during the class and concentrating on hydrating out of the studio. Speaking of water, they say it takes 21 days to form a new habit, and if there is one thing I really want to continue doing once the challenge is over than that definitely must be drinking litres of water daily.  Recently people have been commenting on how well my skin looks, apparently it's glowing sometimes. Also, I've noticed that the whites of my eyes have never been brighter. Aside from daily hour and a half of exercise, I put a lot of it down to water consumption.  Feels like water has featured heavily over the last couple of weeks in my life. I've been drinking gallons, sweating even more, constantly washing of my yoga gear, taking numerous daily showers and baths to help the aches and pains. Water rocks!

Day 19

I woke up at 4.45 am. Snoozed for 15 mins and then at 5am sharp - crawled out of bed on all fours. What was I doing up so early? Well, trying to get to studio by 6am for the worst, toughest yoga session ever. And by saying ever, I really mean EVER. In retrospect, even my first bikram yoga class all those years ago now seems like a breeze. What happened? Not, sure but it felt like a 12 force gale storm. Hurricane. Nothing worked, my breathing, body, mind, everything was disconnected. Is this the famous day 19 wall I've been told about? If yes, then - damn, that's one tall wall! Perhaps it was just the fact that the timing was totally out of sync with my body clock. I haven't slept enough, and at this time of day usually I am still tucked away in my bed not trying to touch my forehead to my knee while balancing on one foot. In any case, I had to do this one so early and rush straight back home and then straight onto a friend's wedding. So I guess it was all worth it. Speaking of weddings, I just realised the one thing I haven't mentioned so far in my blog is - alcohol. Basically, I more or less gave it up totally before embarking on this. So from day one I virtually had no alcohol until this Friday. Friday was a wedding day after all so I had 2 glasses of champagne. The first one went straight to my head, and I nursed the second one for ages, struggling to finish it. I don't miss it that much and definitely intend to stay well away for the next 11 days. Namaste!

Day 18

Late afternoon session today and a very very good one. Worked hard. I feel like I've been maybe pacing myself ever so slightly over the last couple of weeks and that now I'm entering into my finish line sprint. Really intend to go for it and reap up the maximum benefits. 

These past days when I speak to people and they find out I am doing this challenge one of the first questions they ask is 'What are you going to do once you complete it?' It always leaves me slightly baffled. Why? Am I supposed to do something? Run a marathon? Climb something? What? 

Well, now I think I have an answer. I'm considering going for a 7 day bikram yoga retreat next month somewhere nice, warm and sunny. Fingers crossed, it will happen. Namaste!

Day 17

In one of my previous posts, I think it was the beginning of second week of the challenge I touched upon the subject of awareness. More than just amazed at the changes by body is going through, I am fascinated with how this intense practice influences the mind. Hence, over the last couple of days I've done quite a bit of reading on meditation and development of active awareness. Also, a lot has been said recently in media about the concept of "mindfulness" which links directly into this subject. Mindfulness is defined as a state of active awareness; an active attention to the present - being able to actively observe the thoughts or feelings without attaching emotion to them or judging them as good or bad and as a concept is closely related to another area of interest - metacognition sometimes referred to as meta-awareness (cognition about cognition). Mindfulness deals with how you think while metacognition puts more emphasis on what you think about but, just like in this amazing picture the fMRIs of the brain shows significant difference in brain activity when these two are at play. (source: www.pnas.com)

If you have time, have a look at this short clip from a BBC programme, talking about the mindfulness and the effect it can have on human brain. This active awareness developed through meditation can reduce stress, anxiety, depression and even chronic pain. 

Hatha yoga, and hence Bikram is perfect it you want to develop an active focus and clam your mind. The daily practice really does show benefits. Over the last couple of years there has a lot of research performed in the neuroscience area on this, so if like me you are interested in the subject or would like find out more why not check out this paper summary  - Does mindfulness lead to neuroplasticity? - by Micah Allen, PhD. Fascinating stuff.

Day 16

Before I begun this challenge I had made an appointment with my osteopath to come and see him once I'm half way through to check my alignment and possibly treat any injuries, back pain etc... Fortunately, I've had no injuries and the only pain I've experienced so far was the aching muscles especially during the first week but that's now almost completely gone. So it turns out yesterday, unlike on some of my previous visits, that my hips are level and my alignment is all good. The thing that really surprised me was how lose my spine was. For the first time ever, there was no need for him to do a spinal manipulation treatment and click my spine in different places to release the pressure built up. It just wasn't there. Amazing. Day 16 session was an late afternoon one. I'm working at a steady pace now but am beginning to feel the strain on my body. Getting tired. I wonder it this is me coming to a wall that one of the instructors told me about before I embarked on this. Apparently most people doing this challenge reach the low point, or hit the wall around day 19 but once one pulls through that things get a lot easier. I wonder if that's the case. Pretty sure this lingering cold that I've been having over the past week is not making things easier. The effects of these last 15 days have by now pretty much penetrated all the areas of my life, and since yesterday even my dreams. Last night I actually had a dream about doing the Standing Separate Leg Stretching Pose......

Day 15

Today I reached a big milestone - 15 days - half way through my challenge! Looking back over the last two weeks I can honestly say I have enjoyed every minute of it and can't wait for what is yet to come. It's a journey, some days are tough, some are funny, some hurt, some are surprisingly easy. The thing is, you can't really tell what it's going to be like until you're in that hot room. Makes you think; I guess it's like most of things in life. In such pensive mood this morning I decided to go to the 8 am class so that I can make the most of the sunny weather and the day that was ahead. This is the second time when I've been to the late class on the night before and then went straight in again first thing the following morning. It seems to be that my body needs more time to recover, well at least a bit more than twelve hours... Just like during the previous early class, today my body was stiff and my muscles were really tight. My Standing Separate Leg Stretching posture hasn't progressed much since yesterday, in fact I think it's regressed a little bit. But, hey - it's ok. I'm taking it one day at the time. One day my forehead will be on the floor. I also noticed one funny thing today - I am getting friction, probably more accurate to call them towel burns on the arches on top of my feet. The first time I noticed this was today during the Fixed Firm Posture, as my skin was burning in those spots as I was trying to arch my back. I am guessing these are mainly the result of Fixed Firm, Camel and Half Tortoise. I also have slight bruising to my skin at my hipbones, need to thank the Full Locust and Bow pose for those ones. Overall a good practice. It was still early when I left the studio so I had the rest of the day to spend with my daughters. Watching them play in park today, holding hands and wandering away from me these famous lines came to my mind:

'Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.'
(Khalil Gibran; The Prophet, 1923)

Something every parent should be reminded of every now and then. Namaste!

Day 14

Late class today. Feeling much better than past two days, cold definitely shifting. Considering I've took it easy on Friday and Saturday I decided to take a spot in the front row and push myself more. Whenever I practice in the front row in front of the mirror I feel that I work harder as my focus is firm and considering you can see yourself perfectly you are able to track those tiny adjustments in your body that make all the difference. I am becoming slightly obsessed with the Standing Separate Leg Stretching posture. It seems like I've reached some sort of ceiling that I need to break through, just not sure how yet. The advice that I've heard is to make a large step and then instead of keeping your arms up to try putting them on the hips and relax your torso down to make it sink into the crotch. This is supposed to push your buttocks backwards. Once that is done you can lift your arms back up and reassume the pose. Lower down, knees locked, grab on your heels and pull. One correction that I have made and that seems to be making some difference is to place more of the body weight into the heels. So far I think I've been placing my weight too much forward. However, even with all of that my head is just inches above the ground and simply won't go down further and touch the floor. Beginning to think it's my lower back - too tight. Something to work on. 

Day 13

Weekends are always busy in our family and this one was no exception. The weather here in UK has been very good and we've been trying to make the most of it. This also means that along trying to fit about 3 hours per day to accommodate my practice I've had very little free time to sit down and write new posts here. It should be daily,  that was the intention, but I am not beating myself up over it. As long as I get to studio every day and do my yoga - I'm happy. Getting to studio on Day 13 - Saturday was a bit of a challenge considering the cold that came down on me on Friday but having had a solid 8 hour sleep the night before I felt already a lot better. Once in studio I took it easy again, I pushed myself a little bit more than the previous day, I'd say to about 70% of my capacity and sailed through the class. Just a steady practice. Although the previous day I'd felt so bad that I considered dropping out, I am now contended and happy that I pushed myself to persevere. Being in hot room is doing wonders to reduce the effects of cold, no blocked nose, no congestion, I seem to be recovering a lot quicker than I normally do. I guess it's true "you are never too sick...". Mind over matter. Namaste

Day 12

Yesterday was day 12 of my 30 day Bikram yoga challenge. I woke up very early, well I say woke up what I actually mean is - I gave up trying to sleep and got out of the bed. I was awake for what seems like most of the night, as my throat was increasingly beginning to burn and I got so congested overnight that I was struggling to breathe. Once up I assessed the situation- I felt like hell - blocked nose, painful throat, coughs and sneezes, headache and joint ache. Sh*t. Thankfully no temperature. Small mercies. 
Even though I was ambushed by this overnight I was not remotely surprised, as both my daughter and even their nanny had it over the last two weeks or so. My first though was how am I going to get through the day, as all I wanted to do was go back to bed. My second thought was Bikram - no way!
As the day went on I read on line about practicing when ill, and it seems like a lot of the advice suggests to stay at home if you've got a fever and if you're during the first days until the infectious stage passes. Ok, so I do not have a fever and I am doing this challenge thing, so I can't exactly pick and choose which days to go and which not. The other advice I found was: if it's above neck go, if it's below neck stay home. My mind was beginning to tell me that I should really give it a go but my body was aching in terror! Bikram Choudhury in his orange yoga book actually suggests to only do standing series if suffering from cold and flu. With that in mind I very very reluctantly drove off to studio in late afternoon. I made sure I washed my hands before entering the studio, took loads of tissues which i carefully placed between my towel and yoga mat, and finally i tried to choose a spot in a less busy corner of the room. I decided to begin, not push myself at all and see how it goes. I can aways do just the standing series, and spend the rest of the class in Savasana, right? So we started, and I took it really easy. After the first 10 minutes my nose was unblocked and breathing was easy, there were also no coughs or sneezes. Once we got to the end of the standing series I decided to give the floor series a go. In the floor series I skipped the Locust Pose as that one usually requires me to exert myself, so I didn't want to push it. Over all a manageable class but I do have to say that I was operating at 50% of capacity. Amazing thing is I didn't mind heat at all, the studio felt quite cool to me. Strange.

Before going to class I drank a lot, A LOT of liquid. I also self medicated with some food. Blueberry, banana, almond milk and chia seed smoothies for breakfast with my toast. Ate oranges throughout of day and downed copious amounts of various teas with manuka honey. However, my favourite thing I take in times like this has to be bee pollen. When I was I child, my mother used to get this for my brother and me, so a couple of months ago I was ecstatic when I accidentally stumbled upon it in one of the local stores. I love the taste of it, and usually just take it off the spoon but it can also be added to your smoothies or other food. It contains approximately 22 amino acids, 25 minerals, 18 vitamins, 11 enzymes or co enzymes, 14 fatty acids, 11 carbohydrates and is cca 25% protein. A terrific source of B complex vitamins. Amongst other benefits it is enhances energy, boosts the immune system and apparently has an anti-inflammatory effect on the respiratory system. Just what is needed!

Day 11

Spent most of my day in our local park with my husband and our one year old in a typical English drizzle. She didn't mind, nor did I. What's the point of puddles if one can't jump in them. Went to Bikram soon after we got home in late afternoon. Having learnt my food lesson the hard way yesterday, today I made sure to eat a lot through out of the day. Having said that I did not to eat anything for two hours before the class as from experience this = tough class. Doing inversions and a Triangle with a full tummy is something I'll happily leave behind in my early yoga days. Good class today, went really quickly and now I feel nicely stretched and just a little bit taller than this morning.
In car, on my way back from studio this song came up on my radio and it's been playing in my head ever since. Will leave it with you, something to swing your hips to tonight, tomorrow or maybe some other time... St. Paul and the Broken Bones - Call Me.

Day 10

1/3 of the challenge done. Yaaaay! Now it seems like if I want to complete the remaining 2/3 I seriously need to start planning my meals. For me this challenge is not about losing weight. In fact, I absolutely do not want to lose any so since I began with this and up until yesterday I've been eating a lot, and I mean a lot more than I usually do. However, last couple of days were pretty busy, and yesterday due to  poor organisation I ended up eating very little throughout the day before I finally went to my 7pm class. This was bad. Pretty, preeeetty bad. I felt dizzy during the first part of the class, so much so that after The Standing Bow Pulling posture, I had to just skip the Tuladandasana or Balancing Stick and stand still looking at the mirror while recuperating my breath. I am not sure how much of it was the actual physical weakness and how much of it was just my head copping out the Balancking Stick, which although it looks quite straightforward is a killer of a posture that requires you to lock all parts of your body and can, in my case, raise the heartbeat to some phenomenal levels.

So, food planning next. If you have any nutrients, supplements or menu suggestions please do get in touch!

Day 9

Evening class. As most of the evening classes this one was extremely busy, and hot! I feel now that I have settled into the practice and I move from one posture to the next one automatically, without thinking. I am also trying not to come out of the postures too quickly but take my time to release and do it with control. Totally stopped wiping sweat off my body especially face and I am actually starting the to like the sensation of it just freely sliding down my skin. It's cooling me down...Great teacher tonight, made the whole class lough out loud with a couple of anecdotes. I love when this happens, lying down on floor, exhausted, sweat dripping into your eyes and you just laugh. It's like endorphin induced, pure, raw, happiness. While telling one of her funny stories she said something to the lines of funny stories happen all the time when you practice yoga a lot, you just notice things, which is not surprising - yoga develops different awareness. This made me think about the changes I've been experiencing and I can for sure say that I definitely pick up on stuff a lot more than before. Feel a lot more grounded with mind a lot more still that I am simply able to absorb a lot more that is going on around me. I read a bit online about yoga and awareness and here are a couple of quotes. Food for thought.

Developing awareness...

What is Awareness and how do we develop it? These are two of the most common questions asked when it comes to this subject.

Awareness is a connection that occurs in the deep parts of your brain. It is a deep level of understanding not just of one's self but of one's surroundings. It is a sense of togetherness with the many parts of the mind and incorporating the body to become "whole."

Awareness can only come about from an open minded attitude and a positive state of mind. It goes to the core of one's self, a yearning to learn more about yourself and/or your surroundings.

A person who develops this state of mind can feel every part of their body, and they are in touch with there senses. They are proactive and will always think first and move second. They don't fly of the handle so to speak. They are continually in a state of control.

Yoga develops awareness of what is taking place in the moment. It allows you to perceive thoughts at their early stages, before they have acquired any real emotional power.

Awareness is a powerful skill to learn however it is only learnt by taking the journey inwards. It is something that you can't learn at a class in university but it can be learnt by the practice of yoga. (Source: www.yoga.org.nz)

...one more thing about bikram yoga and the mind.

The Mind

Bikram yoga helps you to develop a focused and calm mind, reduces stress and increases your awareness of your body & mind.

Focused and calm mind: Bikram Yoga is challenging. With a regular practice of even one or two classes a week you slowly develop a deeper focus and calmer, more relaxed mind, as well as an amazing awareness of your whole body.  As this develops you will find you are able to increase your level of precision and intesity within the poses.  This process works because Bikram Yoga is intensely physical, it forces you in to meditate, to focus, to be aware of your breath, and to disengage from all outside thoughts.

Stress Reduction: Physical activity is good for relieving stress, and this is particularly true of Bikram yoga. Because of the concentration required, your daily troubles, both large and small, seem to melt away during the time you are doing yoga. This provides a much-needed break from your stressors, as well as helping put things into perspective. The emphasis yoga places on being in the moment can also help relieve stress, as you learn not to dwell on past events or anticipate the future. You will leave a yoga class feeling less stressed than when you started.

Body Awareness: Doing yoga will give you an increased awareness of your own body. You are often called upon to make small, subtle movements to improve your alignment. Over time, this will increase your level of comfort in your own body. This can lead to improved posture and a greater self-confidence. (source: www.sohotbikramyoga.co.uk)

Day 8

Ok, so today turned out to be a family yoga day. My 3 year old has been very intrigued by what I am doing and increasingly pulling out my yoga mat for some self initiated 'stretching' as she calls it. I therefore decided to take her to try out kids yoga. Having looked up some classes in the area the closest one turned out the be the kids class taught by wonderful Antonia Pollock.  I took Antonia's pregnancy yoga classes 4 years ago when pregnant with Mila and loved them, as they were relaxing and really helped with pregnancy induced back pain. I have to say though I probably had more fun on this kids class as all of the kids seemed to be enjoying Antonia's story telling and there was some serious 'stretching' involved both for little ones and parents. The whole thing felt very special to me, as the last time I've been to that particular studio and saw Antonia my now 3 yr old was inside my tummy, and here she was today running around and we were doing it together. Amazing. Mila was thrilled and apparently can't wait to go back. Here she is glowing and putting her mat away after the class...

After my morning kids class I decided to go for a 5 pm bikram session. I persuaded my husband to join me. He has done quite a few classes with me over the last couple of years but hasn't been since his bikram days in Geneva. At first he was reluctant to go, but I bet the prospect of having to scoop out another poo from the bath water gave him that extra push he needed. We left the girls with nanny and headed for the studio. The practice was tough. Not sure why, I just felt extremely hot. I was also distracted by looking at my husband in the mirror and checking to see how he's doing. My Standing Head to Knee still there, so was happy once again to be able to put my forehead to my knee. Felt good after we rushed straight out from the studio and drove home. Not sure how good my husband felt though as he kept muttering words: 'unsettling', 'disturbed', 'brutal'..........

Here he is still sweating, and I promise, it wasn't heated conversation this time. I had very little to do with it, well except for making him go.

Epsom salt bath tonight for both of us.

Day 7

This past weekend was pretty hectic, hence this delay in posting, but still here going strong. I arrived to Sunday afternoon class straight from my daughter's ballet school party. Having helped to set it up and then having spent two hours running around surrounded by the screaming children towards the end my mind was racing to the studio for some peace and quiet. My body however felt a little bit less eager. However, I found the class relatively easy I suppose it was so because I was completely relaxed and managed to control my breath throughout of the session. I can definitely see some progression in my practice. On Sunday for the first time ever I went fully into one of my favourite postures - Standing Head to Knee. 

There are four parts to this posture and to get to final one the first three need to be completed in sequence.

Part 1 - involves transferring the body weight to the left foot and locking the knee of the left leg while picking up the right foot and interlacing all ten fingers on its sole. The thigh of the right leg at that point should be parallel to the floor, giving the right leg the look of an upside-down L. If comfortable in that position you can move to 
Part 2 - If your standing leg is locked and you can balance you lift the upper body and kick the right foot forward until the leg is parallel to the floor. Feet on the extended legs are fixed and the heel is kicking forward, again if you can hold part 2 and if you can balance than move to 
Part 3 - Slowly round your back and while holding the extended foot bend the elbows down until they are below the calf muscle. 
Part 4 - Finally if both legs are straight and you can balance slowly bend your head down keep focused on one point on the floor, tuck your chin to your chest and slowly touch the forehead to your knee.
Repeat with other leg. 

My tips would be to always take time at the beginning of the posture to make sure that your weight is distributed evenly across all of the standing foot - heel, toes, side. Also, do not go into this posture without engaging the abdominal muscles and keeping them engaged throughout. This ensures your lower back is protected. I have been struggling for some time with part 4, because as soon as I would bring my head down I'd lose the balance and fall out of the posture. What I think really helped on Sunday was revisiting my abdominals and pulling them in tighter while also engaging both of my thigh muscles, basically locking both of knees. This made my body feel solid so it was a lot easier to pull my head down.

So this is my week 1 done. I have to say it has been hard work but enjoyable. Also I realised that I've been having a couple of hours to myself every day this past week, something I haven't been able to do for a very long time. Anyone with 2 children under the age of 3 will probably appreciate this. My husband has become a bit of a 'bikram widower' as he said the other day and has been having to manage a couple of bath times all on his own. On Sunday night before I left we put the girls in their shared bath for some bubbles fun. Just as I opened the door to go I was embraced my husband and girls' collective screaming coming from top floor as our youngest pooed in their bath water...... Took a deep breath, stepped out and closed the door. Namaste.

Day 6

Last night, after the super heated yoga class I finally decided to use the Epsom salts recommended by one of the teachers to help relieve aches and muscle pains I've been having. I filled the bath with warm water and put in about 1 cup of this remedy and just lied there for about half an hour. Seems like it really helped with muscular pain, but the thing that surprised me more was how soft my skin was afterwards. Quick google search on magnesium sulfate and it turns out this little remedy can be used for many other things. It's a treatment for eclampsia in pregnant women, in baths for pain relief, eczma treatment, smoothing out wrinkles ( not that I have any....ahm, ahm), hair volumising, softening dry skin to name just a few. Both magnesium and sulfate play important role in a body. Magnesium helps regulate the body's enzyme activity and sulfate hepls create joint proteins and strengthens the walls of digestive tract. By taking Epsom salt baths both of these can be absorbed through skin, so great for restoring the levels especially for those suffering from deficiency.

This morning I decided to go for a 10am class. Upon arrival checked with guys at reception - heather problem solved - I proceeded in. Got a spot on the mat at the back of the room as I have decided to move around every session to bring a bit of a change into my practice (and maybe even find out where the super hot spots are so I can avoid those in the future...) When the teacher came in it surprised me when I recognised her. She thought me my first ever bikram yoga class back in 2007 at a different studio close to my then office and I had no idea that she now worked in this one too. Having seen her, I was looking forward to the class as she was one of my favourite teachers back then and I'd always leave her classes having improved at least one of my postures. This happened today, during the triangle pose (a master posture, that I've been having a love-hate relationship ever since 2008 - deserves a separate post of its own one of these days). She came and adjusted my alignment of the extended leg by turning my hip/knee towards the floor slightly. This in turn helped my balance, and helped me sink my hips even deeper to the ground. Triangle - finally getting there...

Day 5

Started noticing definite change in my sleeping patterns. I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow and unlike a couple of weeks ago I do not wake up in the night anymore, don't spend ages shuffling around bed and go into a really, really deep sleep. This is good. I woke up this morning feeling refreshed and energised. So much so, that in the first couple of hours of day I sorted out a lot of stuff around the house that I've been meaning to do for ages but been putting it off. I wouldn't be far off by saying I went slightly 'hyper'. In this frame of mind I arrived to studio for my afternoon class and ... hit the wall. My body was tired, and this wasn't helped by the fact that the studio had some problems with the heaters. Apparently, they weren't switching off which basically meant that the room was being heated up non stop throughout of the day. As I stood there on my mat half way through the practice I felt like I was in hell. My skin was burning. At one point I seriously contemplated just getting the hell out of there but looking around seemed like I wasn't the only one struggling and a lot of the people around me were feeling the heat. Later, after I took my shower and was getting to leave I heard one of the girls at the reception saying that the room temperature at one point reached 52 degrees C while we were in there. That explains a lot.......I hope they fix it by tomorrow morning!

Day 4

Over the last couple of days I have been drinking approximately 3 litres of water per day but still it seems I am not re-hydrating enough. This morning I woke up with a slight headache which got progressively worse as the day went on. Went to the 4pm class wondering how I'm going to get through the 90 minutes at 42 degree C with my head already feeling like it's about to explode. The class wasn't busy so there were plenty of spots to choose from. Surprisingly once we started, as I moved through asanas the pain kept losing on intensity and by the end of the session it was completely gone. I took my time and really relaxed in the final Savasana. By the time I showered and left the studio, not just that the pain was gone, I was far more relaxed and energised than earlier on in the day. In terms of practice, seems like my focus is coming back and balancing poses are really the ones I am enjoying at the moment. I read somewhere that for yoga you need strength, balance and flexibility but that most people lack and need to work on one of these. Well, looks like my balance is definitely here. At the moment the Pulling Bow Standing posture is my favourite, as I am finally getting the hang of the kicking the leg part. In any case, today was a reminder to rethink my re-hydration. I got some of the Emergen C sachets which I can use in the water after the class and help replace lost electrolytes. Meet my new friends....

Day 3

Writing has never really been my thing. That is something that my brother does very well, I on the other hand have always preferred numbers. Despite that, I decided to create this blog as I secretly hope it will keep me going through the next couple of weeks so please bear with me. I do realise also that for those of my friends who read this and are not familiar with bikram yoga, reading about asanas and other yogi stuff daily might not be as interesting as to the ones doing the practice. Therefore, I will also start blogging about things that I do and like and which keep me motivated, wether that be food I use to keep the energy levels up, music, or other totally random stuff so watch this space...

Today was a good day. T & I took the girls to Tate Modern to see 'Henri Matisse: The Cut-Outs' exhibition. This is something I promised my first born daughter. A couple of weeks ago, by pure chance she saw a short BBC programme "Goldie's Private View of Matisse" where Goldie the musician walks through the gallery and gives a low down on his favourite pieces. Ever since she's been slightly obsessed by 'The Snail' and 'Icarus' whose story I had to recount at least six times today. She came back with two prints that we now have to hang on the wall in her room. Here she is taking it all in. 

We walked a lot today, so I gave myself some rest in the afternoon and went to a 7pm yoga class. It seems to be that the evening mid week classes are the most popular ones. The studio was full today, to the maximum capacity. In total, 71 people squeezed in one small room. My mat was touching my fellow yogis' mats practicing both to the left and right of me and there was absolutely no personal space, but that is something you pretty much have to leave at the door before you go in anyway. Nonetheless, in my experience these busy classes are some of the best I attended as at times the energy and the synchronised movement in the room is incredible and it just carries you through the class. That was the case tonight. The teacher was great, encouraging and guiding us through at a great pace. I had a quick chat with her afterwards, as I wanted to know the aches and pains I am experiencing all over my body are going to get any better over the next 27 days, and her answer in short was - no. She did however suggested getting some Epsom salts, and using them in long baths. Also I should apparently try and get some foam rollers to use on my muscles. Not even sure how these things look like, but will be hitting the shops tomorrow. All in all, totally unexpected after the last two days but today's class was by far the easiest. Feeling relaxed.

Day 2

Morning class today. 10 am. Studio wasn't too busy and it seemed like a perfect start to the day. Walking into the room and sitting down on my mat I could feel my body already aching from the previous day's session. However, 10 minutes into the standing series the pains and stiffness were gone. Initially it seemed I was going to sail through this one but it turned out to be less straightforward. In fact, it felt like my body wasn't allowing me to go as deep into positions as it did the previous day.  On the other hand, I was able to exert much more control over my movements, cut out unnecessary fidgeting and clear my heard for a large chunk of the class. Teacher kept repeating "Go back to your breath" and so I did. So easy, but even more easily forgotten.

About half an hour upon leaving the studio tiredness set in. Heavy body, heavy eyelids kind of tired. I was surprised by this sheer wave of exhaustion when it dawned on me - I just did 2x90mins session in  less then 24 hours. Now, I know there are yogis out there who do far more than that but for me this one is a biggie. If there is anything that will keep me going back to the studio every day with no exceptions during the next 28 days - it is the thought of having to do a double session in one day!

It's 19:42 and aiming to be in bed in an hour. Unprecedented.

Namaste

Day 1

Yesterday I completed day 1 of my 30 day challenge. In retrospect, starting this thing with a 5pm class on a UK Bank Holiday Monday was probably not a great idea. It was hot, sun was shining and I am guessing for most of us in London this mainly means one of the following - park, bbq, pub, or anything that serves drinks and has an open terrace/garden. Driving to the studio I passed by a number of such establishments bursting at their seams, and couldn't help but question my motivation and if I am really prepared to commit to this for the next couple of weeks. I took a deep breath, put all of this sudden self doubt down to good weather and decided to go for it. To hell, we are in England after all, it's bound to rain any moment now!

Got to the class in good time and found a spot in the front row right next to the mirror. When we began with the first breathing exercise (Pranayama) it was pretty clear this was going to be a tough one. Last week's long weekend in Croatia, one too many drinks and cigarettes, a couple of weeks of a very sporadic exercising regime, all came back to haunt me. It was payback time. By the time the breathing exercise was over I was already covered in sweat. However, the standing series begun and a small miracle happened, in the last part of the Half Moon Pose i finally managed to glue my forehead to my legs and lock the knees. After years of on and off practice (well, mostly off), I finally nailed this one! Being in this position felt so different than what it felt like trying to get there all these years. It felt right, something inside me said 'of course!' and it felt good, so good that I just wanted to stay there. The thrill of that moment kept me going through the rest of the standing series which were challenging. Now, I can usually manage the standing head to knee pose, and bend my head down to my knee on good days, but this Monday I was struggling to keep my foot in the air. By the time we hit the floor panic set in and my mind was racing. A frenzy. An avalanche of thoughts. Random, unrelated thoughts. Just as I would get rid of one, another one would come along. It seemed as if my energy was being used up more on this mental struggle rather than the actual physical exercise. I think I managed to find the stillness during only about 10% of the 90 minutes in the hot room. The rest of the time was a battle. I remember the classes from a couple of years ago where my mind was still for all of the 90 minutes. The amazing realisation that for 90 minutes my mind was empty. Resting. I wonder how long it will take me to get there this time around? Something to look forward to.......

On my way back home, the first song the radio played when I got into the car opened with the line "Have you got colour in your cheeks?".... Funny. Crawling back to you Bikram, crawling.... Arctic Monkeys.